The 365 Commitment

Day 15 – The Power of a Positive No

The benefits of keeping our simple commitment are starting to become very real for me. I am only 2 weeks into the commitment and I am astonished at some of the changes that I have started to make in my personal life. At first they were subtle changes, but looking back I am starting to understand what the effect of having a daily routine of settling upon an inspired list of tasks that I am going to accomplish that will make my day the most meaningful that it can be.

Imagine that if everyday of your life – you started with the purpose and focus to not squander your time on earth, that you were going to make use of your day to accomplish what is really important to you and to those you love and care about.

A book that my wife got me to read a few months ago called “The Power of a Positive No” by William Ury articulates the benefit of keeping this commitment. When you focus on what is important to you and set out to accomplish it, you are automatically very careful about saying Yes to other people that try to get you to do something important for them. Interesting concept right? Make you feel a little nervous?

Everyone that has joined this group are well intended people – probably the reason I convinced you to take on this commitment is because I see that in you. If you are a well intended person then one of your flaws is that you probably say Yes all the time. Because you are a good person, you are probably somewhat dependable, so other people will constantly ask you do to things and you will almost always say YES! This has got you pretty far, people like you, so you are likely to continue this behavior. The challenge is that saying Yes all the time will eventually cause you to lose focus on what is important to you, it will cause you to dilute your ability to really change the world for the better and saying Yes will cause you to become very stressed as you pile on more commitments that are not related to your personal aspirations.

This is not selfish. Setting goals to better the world around you, to help others you see that are in need of help and to work on things that you believe God has inspired you to do is a worthwhile objective. If saying Yes distracts you from accomplishing what you set out to do, then saying No is perfectly acceptable! In fact now you can say No, and provide a really good reason! I am sorry I cannot do that because I have another commitment that is really important that I must accomplish and saying Yes to you will cause me to not get that really important commitment done. When phrased like that – the person asking you will most likely understand and be ok with you saying No.

Now sometimes a person will come to you and ask you to do something that is in line with what you already want to accomplish. This is an awesome moment! You can now say Yes and at the same time accomplish one of your primary objectives for the day or even for your life.

A good example was last week. I wrote down on my morning list – “spend some time with my wife.” I set it as priority #1. Priority 1 is a special place for me on my list. It means – I will get this done no matter what happens today. No sooner then I finished my prayer about my list – then my wife walked in the door of my office and asked – “Guy, would you like to go to breakfast with me?” Of course I said Yes, and I really was grateful to do so! Saying Yes to her accomplished my #1 priority. I found out later that she had put a very similar task on her list.

This morning I was forced to put a task down for something I really do not want to do. I made a commitment to help someone a while back ago and now I have to spend time today helping. The task is mundane and completely not aligned with my primary objectives in life. If I keep this commitment up, how many times do you think I am going to allow myself to take up my precious #1 priority slot with something I really do not want to do, or feel is not in alignment with my goals?

The 365 Commitment has helped me to really think carefully before I say yes, and that is a good thing.

Guy Reams (15)
365 Member

*Note – the (15) is the number of days that I have kept the commitment in a row. It is perfectly ok to have a (1) next to your name, or a (5) or a (7). This is not bragging, this is accountability. Try it sometime – let people you love and trust know what you are trying to accomplish and then report back to them. It is powerfully motivating. When I wake up now – I want to get my list done because I cannot imagine reporting back to this group that I am back at (1) again!. I am sure that will happen one day, and that is perfectly ok. However, my goal is to keep this commitment for 365 days in row. I hope you stay with me on this journey. We are going to be better for it.

Feel free to hold yourself accountable by emailing the group @ [email protected]

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