He “just rubs me the wrong way,” is a comment I heard recently about someone. I was in a discussion about leaders in my company and someone made this comment about another person. I kept thinking about this comment. The person that said this, really felt like this was justification for their negative view of another person in the company. I think what she meant was that the other person causes friction, creates uncomfortable conversations.
So I am wondering, is that a bad thing?
Maybe “rubbing the wrong way” is actually a good thing? I know we would all like everyone to agree with us all the time, to let us do whatever we want, to allow things to happen in a friction less manner. However, is that the best thing for you? The answer to that question is unfortunately, no. You may want a nice and smooth path, but that well travelled road just does not lead to success. If someone does rub you the wrong way, perhaps you need to take a considerable pause in your thinking and ask yourself, why?
Also, do you find yourself agreeing with your leadership, agreeing with everyone to be perceived as a cooperative enabling sort of person? If that is the case, I hate to be the bearer of bad news. Most successful leaders do NOT want that behavior. They actually WANT to be rubbed the wrong way! Of course there is a difference between offering an alternative view and being downright obstinate. At some point, usually when a final decision is made you need to flip to being a supporter and not the antagonist. However, rubbing the wrong way needs to be considered a good thing until a decision is made.
So go ahead and rub people the wrong way!