Every morning, I am faced with a significant decision that encapsulates my daily struggle: the choice between the donut shop and the gym. This decision has become a literal and figurative symbol of my commitment to choosing vitality over indulgence. A few blocks from my home lies a gym, a place I frequent in pursuit of health and fitness. Ironically, right next door to that gym is a donut shop, tempting me with its sugary delights. As I pull into the parking lot, the contrast is stark and unavoidable. Some days, I notice people opting for both destinations, a humorous yet poignant reminder of life’s balance. This daily choice has led me to a profound realization I developed in my early twenties: each morning when you wake up and look into the mirror, the truth is fluid, shaped by the choices you make.
A Radical Concept: The Fluidity of Truth
This is a radical concept, and your instinct might be to dismiss it. However, hear me out. I had the same initial reaction. Before I delve deeper, let me lay the groundwork. When I was growing up, a book that was popular among us aspiring college hippies was “Journey to Ixtlan” by Carlos Castaneda. In this book, Castaneda interviews a character named Don Juan, who teaches him about the ways of his tribe. Amidst the psychedelic experiences with peyote that attracted many college readers, there was one concept that resonated deeply with me—the idea that the personal past does not exist.
Rejecting the Personal Past
At first, I thought this idea was absurd. Of course, I have a personal past, and it is very real. I am marked, scarred, uplifted, and sometimes damaged by my past experiences. However, Don Juan emphasizes that one’s personal past can cloud the ability to see and understand the present. As I’ve grown older, I’ve come to realize the truth in this. The personal past is indeed something that happened, but it no longer exists in the present moment. The events of the past are gone forever; you cannot recreate, relive, or repeat them. So, the only thing you truly have is what is staring back at you each morning. Rejecting the personal past is not about dismissing the importance of heritage and ancestry; it is about recognizing that the only real power you possess is to live fully in the present.
A Doctor’s Profound Wisdom
This concept of having no personal past prepared me for a talk I once heard from a retired medical doctor. He was speaking to motivate a group of young men like myself, sharing an emotional testimony about the true aims in life. Despite his age, he emanated a spiritual strength that was palpable, his powerful gaze commanding full attention. During his talk, he made an audacious claim: when you wake up in the morning and look into the mirror, nothing is true anymore; it is all gone. Every day, you must prove to yourself anew that what you hold sacred remains true. Frankly, I did not understand this at all. It hung in the air, confusing me and those around me. We exchanged puzzled looks, shrugged our shoulders, and dismissed this bit of wisdom as just another eccentric statement from an old man.
Daily Reaffirmation of Core Beliefs
However, as I edge closer to the “old guy” stage of my life, I realize that this man was imparting a pearl of profound wisdom, and I regret not having the ears to hear it then. If I had truly listened, I would have understood the importance of keeping the most vital aspects of my life front and center. I would have known to carry only the precious baggage, as everything else merely weighs you down. I would have grasped the significance of reaffirming your beliefs and the course you wish to navigate every single day. I would have appreciated the power of personal resolve and not taken for granted the truths I hold dear. Every day, when you look into that mirror, you must acknowledge that you need to prove once again that what you believe at your core remains true, remains strong, remains important, and still deserves your undivided attention.
Choosing Life Over Indulgence
So, I will not walk into the donut shop. Instead, I will choose the gym, reaffirming my decision every morning. I will choose life over death, truth over lies. I will live in the moment and refuse to let my personal past anchor me to long-held biases and unsettling fears.
