When I was younger I always wanted to know how would I know when I officially was a grown up. Five decades later, I think I am still waiting for someone to tell me that I have grown up. I suppose the first time that I filed a 1040 might be a good one, or the first time I paid a mortgage, or the first time I cleaned my room without anyone telling me to do so. However, I think the real indicator of being grown up is maturity. So what the heck is maturity?
I have heard a million attempts at defining this concept. Maturity is interesting and I imagine that you can have a mature outlook in one area but be completely adolescent in your thinking in another. However, recently I stumbled across a a concept for maturity that made a lot of sense and really hit me to the core – because it was deficient and very immature. The concept is this:
Maturity is the ability to reject good opportunities for even better ones.
Did you get that? I credit Ray Dalio for this – although I am not sure it is his creation. It makes sense coming from a person that makes all their money on investments. Investors really do not choose between bad investments and good investments. Most the time they are choosing between all good options, with certain options being better for particular reasons than other ones depending on circumstances. However, the point should not be lost. It is really hard to reject good opportunities. However, that is what has caused me the most struggle in my life. It has not been the bad decisions, although I had to fight through a few of those, it has been mostly that I have said yes to everything that came my way and in so doing spread myself too thin and have been able to maximize any one opportunity.
Being able to pick the best path at the peril of some decent paths is really what maturity is all about. I am not sure I am there yet, but I think I am closer. The 365 commitment that I started, was the first time that I decided to pick one thing over many good options. I picked one thing to focus on everyday, and in so doing gained tremendously. I added more as I increased capacity, but the point is – focus is important.
In a world where we have many opportunities to chase, it is really difficult to focus but focus we must because that is how we will stand apart and how we will show real value. It is not a bad thing to say no to certain opportunity, it is actually a good thing a sign of true maturity.
Guy Reams
365 Alumni
62 Days Left to 1st Marathon
