In reading this research paper, called “the Unengaged Mind“, I came across this concept that being distracted or unengaged and having a lack of emotional awareness are very related. People who lack self awareness, or unable to articulate what they want to do or desire to do really struggle with controlling extreme feelings of discouragement, anxiety, and boredom.

Yesterday, I wrote about this feeling of ennui and how to think about overcoming it, but today I realized that this ability to understand your emotions is just as important. You see an engaged mind is a mind that is more connected with how it is feeling, why it is feeling that way and understands what has to be done to influence the emotions differently.

Here is something that I have uncovered reading behavioral psychology research. Emotions can be changed and can be changed rather quickly. If you are feeling a certain way, and it is negative, healthy people (or engaged people) know exactly what to do to quickly reverse that emotion. Unhealthy people (the unengaged mind) will allow themselves to wallow away and slide down further into those negative emotions.

The unengaged are first, unware of the fact that a negative emotion is impacting them. To be engaged you must first recognize that you are having an emotion, realize the impact is going to have on you and then act. The primary thing that an engaged person does that a unhealthy mind does not do, is act quickly on negative emotions. Instead of allowing yourself to feel a certain way, quickly do something that will stir a different emotion. That is the key. Usually in 15 minutes or less of doing a different activity, you can reverse the negative feelings brought about due to an emotion.

This is what is meant by a engaged mind. An awareness of what you are feeling. Some call it mindfulness. I am aware of how I am feeling. Not so much worried about why, unless it is immediate apparent. For example, I am feeling sad because my goldfish died. Well that is a normal reaction, that is acceptable. However, the engaged mind recognized when a negative emotion arises. I am feeling lonely, depressed, discouraged, despondent, bored, angry or anxious. The engaged mind will quickly apply a fast fix to that emotion, changing direction to quickly alter the course and cause the mind to start feeling a different emotion.

Guy Reams

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