This is how the story goes. You are sitting in a business meeting going over all the various things that have to happen. Those things are all mission critical. The people who have been invited to this meeting are the ones who need to be working on and accomplishing these mission critical tasks. The meeting progresses, the leaders outline the requirements, explain the key results desired, share the leader’s intent, and walk through the what and the whys. Every leader wants everyone to feel like they have a voice, so they ask for people’s feedback. This is what happens. The young man at the table, bright eyed, eager, and recently graduated MBA, Cum Laude or whatever, will say the following:
“What they need to do is…”
So I am going to pause right here in the story and let you in on a little secret. It will save you a ton of time, embarrassment, and countless years of wondering why you got passed up for a promotion to a job that you felt you deserved. If you ever find yourself in the position of the young man, and you open your mouth and utter this beginning sentence, then please let me save you a ton of heartbreak. You ready for it? Major news flash here.
You are the they.
That is right, the second you make the comment, everyone in the room, and especially the leaders, instantly recognize and understand that you are the they of which you speak. Do you understand that? The sooner you do, the faster you will progress in life and understand what you are actually up against.
Is the junior associate at the table the one who gets all the real work assignments? Yes. Is that fair? Absolutely. Does the junior associate who is excited about doing things the right way get to stumble and struggle with figuring out how to make that happen? Yes. Without any help? Yes. Is that fair? Absolutely.
I am not going to explain that. The young associate will want an explanation for that logic. They will want to understand the order of things, the hierarchy, the proper channels, and the proper way to climb said ladder. Let me save them the heartache and the mockery at their expense. The logic is, the young associate is the they. That is why they are there in the first place. Do not get it twisted. It is simple, really.
The rule to always remember is if you do not know who they are, then it is you. So please, please, please, do not open your mouth at the table and tell the senior leaders what “they need to be doing.” You make yourself look the fool, and worse, you are just heaping mounds of more work on they. Which is you.
