A core principle to consider in daily living is to get control of what you spend your attention on before the world does it for you. I do this with a morning ritual. Every morning I like to ask myself the question, what is the most important thing that I should accomplish today? Many times I draw a blank when asking this question, so I go back and look at the 12 goals I have set for myself. Armed with that, I decide what is going to get most of my attention that day.
Now things will come up, distractions from every corner of my life will present themselves but now I am in control. I can decide what is allowed to distract me and what is not. When I know what I want to work on today, it is a whole lot easier to defer or decline things that pull me away from that primary aim.
If you do not do this before the day starts, then you are in the danger zone. Without knowing your aim for the day, it is easy to say yes and allow yourself to be yanked around by other people’s demands. Oftentimes, that is unavoidable. Your boss calls, your spouse needs you, your child is sick, true. However, I am talking about a trend over 365 days. Most days you have the choice, and you cannot choose your own goals if you do not have a specific, actionable thing in your mind for that day.
Even if your boss calls, you do have an option. Think about this. Your boss says, I need you to stop what you are doing right now and prepare those meeting notes for our meeting with a client tomorrow. That is a high priority for your boss and the company, no doubt. Normally, you drop everything and do what your boss says. However, what if you said something to the effect of – hey boss, I will get on it right away; however, I want you to be aware that I was planning on working on that strategic revenue growth plan you want me to get done today. This is not offensive at all; this just presents a very real decision for the boss to make. Two priorities – which is more important?
This framing, a polite way to say no, is very powerful. When you tell someone that you would love to help but you cannot because you are working on a really important project today, they tend to be very forgiving. This is why, unconsciously, people always ask, when they start out the conversation, " What have you got going on today? What are you up to? They are testing to see if you have room to help them with what they need. This is an important moment, and if you have already prioritized your day, you have a prepared answer.
So my advice? Come up with your most important thing early in the morning before anyone else can influence you. Decide what to spend your attention on. This will not work every day, but it will work most of the days, and that is where you start racking up points on the scoreboard of achieving your goals.
