So this morning I was contemplating a phase that you hear growing up in a western culture. The source is the sermon on the mount and Jesus refers to the concept of avoiding the mistake of focusing on the faults of others while you have your own faults to deal with.
A common phraae that we use sometimes is “having a blind spot.” Something that we glance over, without much thought while we look to the source of our problems. I made the connection this morning that a key symptom of a person or an organization with a blind spot is the absolute insistence that others are at fault for their problems.
Oh boy. That opened a can of worms for me. I started to catalog when I have blamed others for my problems. At first, I thought, I never do that. Then about 15 minutes later, I found myself thinking, “if my wife would stop that then I could…” I stopped midsentence. Why am I blaming my wife for that? I really thought about it. Then in short order, damn it. I have a bigger problem. My wife’s behavior is not the cause, it is a symptom resulting from my larger problem.
So now as I probe deeper into my life, I have found many areas where I am doing this. Scapegoating my larger problem onto others. Attributing reactions to the elephant in the room, not to the elephant, but to them. How many times have I considered the emotional shortcomings of another, while I conceal my own basket case full?
I am a confident person, raised by people who taught me that I could do anything. Yet, I am just as worried about my own place in the world, what others think of me as anyone else. Consequently, I over compensate to appease my fear of failure. Due to the confidence factor, I rarely stop and take stock if I have misjudged the situation. Is my instinct accurate, or is the spidey sense tingling because the evil menace lurking around the corner is in my own head and not in the short comings of others?
Wow. I need to rise up out of this lesser mindset. Learn to acknowledge and grapple with the behemoth that has beset me and not the challenges that grip others in fear. Perhaps by learning to overcome my own inadequacies, I really can help to lift others above their own.
Geez. The older you get the more raw and real life gets, doent it? The more aware you become, the more your eyes are open, the more you see clearly. Sh!t. Things do not look so good under the microscope of self inspection and with the powerful lens of clear perspective.
But would you have it any other way? Would you have taken the other path, swallowed the blue pill, and go back to a life of ignorant bliss. One where everyone else is at fault? Nah. The red pill is best. Cold, hard, brutal truth. Freedom from an oppressive and broken mind, no matter how desperate it leaves you.
Do you have the audacity to see clearly? To see your life as it actually is? Look in the mirror and call yourself out. Hey you lazy loser, hey you drug addict, hey you abusive bully, hey you, yeah the morally bankrupt soul! You going to just go about another day basking in the dull gray of a listless life, or are you going to do something about it? For most of us that mirror chat will be a little more mild, but I write to the extreme!! That is how I roll! Life on the edge!
Yeah, I would rather have the truth. I would rather know. If I am going to be in a fight, then I want it to count for real. I want to know what is lurking in that blind spot. I may not like it, it may scare the crap out of me, but I would rather die in a battle against the real devil, then win a farce with one of his puppets.
So I am pulverized and paralyzed with some shocking introspection by leaning forward closely and seeing what is really there. But do not worry, I see my true enemy now. That sucker has a problem now. I am in fight mode, and I am all in. Joining the crew of the Nebechuddnezzar.
Guy Reams
