112 – Feelings, Nothing More Than Feelings

Feelings can derail us. It goes something like this. Step one, make your 365 Commitment list for the day. Step two, pray/meditate and then proceed to do your best – working through your list and keeping your commitment to good habits you have committed to. Step three, allow someone or something to upset you so much that you lose focus at some point in the day and bail on your commitments.

I’m not sure what to do about this. I would like to say that the answer is simply to not let that happen. Simply, don’t do it, don’t let that happen. Easier said than done. Were it that easy, yesterday would have had a different outcome. Maybe I should just chalk it up to a bad day and move forward with today.

I know some strategies for coping when rising emotions threaten to derail. 1) Ask myself, “what do I really want as an outcome in this situation?” This tactic, in theory engages the more rational parts of the brain and can help avoid actions and/or words we may regret. 2) Remove myself from the person or situation that is upsetting my emotions. This tactic is basically the “flight” response, a tried and true and deeply instinctual response for good reason I suppose. 3) Let go of expectations or control of the situation, sort of unplug. I’m not sure about this one, maybe it’s good, maybe it’s not, seems like a kind of cop-out. But, I suppose it’s better than losing one’s cool. 4) From a Spock-like objective and rational place, seek to understand the person and or situation and then formulate the best response. In the face of a tough situation, these may be woefully inadequate tactics, but it’s all I got this morning. Maybe there is one more . . . if an alternative personality is available to you , one that does not get upset, then simply slip into that personality. Hmm, might be flirting with mental illness here, sort of a fighting fire with fire response I would imagine.

Well, it is a new day with trouble enough; so, no need to compound it with yesterday’s trouble. I think a slogan from my the past, when I was a kid tagging along with my mom to al-anon meetings, is most apropos – “Let Go and Let God.”

Ben Wagner (119)

Member The 365 Commitment

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Kayann McPeak

7 years ago

Woah, heavy thoughts here. Sometimes life just gets in the way of every good intention we have. I might have one more solution to add to your list of what to do. Maybe a nice long walk, coupled with prayer, might return one in a much calmer emotional place. Fresh air seems to wonders. One of the things I pray often is Paul’s prayer in Colossians 1 – that we/I may grow in Knowledge, Wisdom and Understanding.
Blessings, Kayann

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Ben Wagner

7 years ago

Reply to Kayann McPeak

Hi Kayann! Wondered if you were still perusing this blog 🙂

Yes, that is very good advice. Thank you!

Warm regards,
Ben

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