The ability of negation is precisely human. There are very few species that can even conceive the concept of something not being in the present. It is either here or not. Many philosophers have argues some salient points around this topic. This very concept maybe the very thing that formed human consciousness. The ability for us to consider the ideal (God like figure) and therefore understand the gap between where we are at and the ideal. This is either an amazing phenomena that occurred in nature to develop the human mind or it is the one gap that evolutionary science cannot figure out, meaning perhaps there really is a God and that explains this. Either way, the thought of God had such incredible power, it transformed our species into what it is today. I will leave it up to others to debate the truth of it all, I am more interesting in the impact these concepts have on my desire to conquer or master self. Which brings me back to negation.
The negative, or saying no, is where you have the opportunity, the one single chance to represent yourself, and become individual. You have many opportunities to say no throughout the day, the problem is that you rarely use that opportunity. This is my problem. I am a yes man. I am always saying yes. When I say yes too frequently I become controlled by others. They start to have a greater influence on me, they start to dictate who I am and who I will become. Saying yes is important, it is vital, you are agreeable, affable, likeable, employable when you say yes. However, saying no is more powerful. No is when you inform people and society who you are and what you stand for. No is when you make an active choice to influence the world around you and to make a difference.
No causes conflict, which we like to avoid. No can hurt other people’s feelings or reject someone that is depending on you. No is very immediate message that what you are being asked is not in line with what you want to accomplish. I am here to tell you that only people that can truly be successful learn to say no. This is and always has been my single barrier to success. Saying yes too much. I need to learn to say no more often!
Guy Reams
