One of the many mental devices that plaque me and I am sure many others is the constant desire for a pat on the back. I think we all need to learn one really important lesson. You do not deserve to get a pat on the back for the things you are supposed to do. Get over it. You see we do one day of exercise and then we are looking for that immediate response telling us how great we are. Well, sorry, but going to the gym for one day is not great, in fact it is not even note worthy in the slightest. You are supposed to exercise and get a certain amount of physical activity everyday. Anything less than that and you are just failing, plain and simple. Sorry, that may hurt, but it is the plain and simple truth. We all know this. We all know we need daily exercise to live a happy, healthy, and productive life. So quit looking for a pat on the back because one day you decided to get up and go do what you were supposed to do all along! I am victim to this all the time. I find myself almost looking around for praise because I did one thing good.
Exercise is just one. Take eating well for instance. Preparing, cooking and eating a healthy meal is what you are supposed to do everyday. My problem is that I do that one meal on one day and expect angels to fly down from heaven singing my praises. Reality is that I figured out how to do the thing I am a supposed to do just once. Big whoopie. Congratulations. Do that 1,095 (365X3) times in a row and then maybe, just maybe, you will have something to brag about.
This extends to many things in life. We raise a child, who is nice to people, kind, hard working, and has a desire to be a productive member of society. We act like that is amazing parenting. That maybe true, but by what standard? That is what we are supposed to do, right? Just because most of society cannot get that right, does not mean that we did amazing work. It just means we did the job. No praise needed. You got the job done.
Maybe this issue is why so many people struggle with the basics, including myself. We just need to recognize that you do not get a pat on the back for doing what you were supposed to do in the first place. I have perhaps a better idea, why don’t we just do what we are supposed to do and then after achieving that they go ahead and do something extra ordinary then you can take your bow, because then you have achieved something.
We all probably need a healthy dose of reality in some aspect of our lives. Are we looking for a pat on the back all the time for just doing the job? I remember in Kindergarten I got a diploma for graduating. I was extremely suspicious of that. I thought, wait a minute, this whole experience was mandatory. Why am I being rewarded for something I was forced to do? Concept applies to life as well. Do you get a reward for just being human? Do you get a certificate for just going through the motions? Nah, I don’t think so. Maybe we need to encourage ourselves and others to start being amazing, instead of just doing the job.
Guy Reams
