There’s a way of thinking about ideas that turns the whole notion of personal development on its head. Typically, we believe that ideas are things we create. They emerge from our thinking, our environment, or our imagination. But many spiritual and psychological traditions including Carl Jung’s suggest something much stranger and far more intriguing:
Ideas are not created, they exist. More than that, ideas are living things.
Not living in the biological sense, of course. But alive in the sense that they carry energy, direction, and intent. They have shape and movement. They arrive. They cling. They whisper. They persuade. They linger. And every so often, they take hold of us without our noticing.
Jung expressed this through the notion that “we do not have ideas, ideas have us.”
If that’s true, and I think many of us have felt the truth of it, then our internal life becomes less about inventing ideas and more about deciding which ones we allow to take up residence.
And that’s where the real shift begins.
Ideas as Entities and Not Extensions of Self
If ideas are entities, then they have a kind of independence. They are not you. They are not your identity. They are more like visitors at the door.
Some stay a moment. Some stay a lifetime. Some move in without being invited.
Take the idea, “I am a failure.”
That idea shows up strong. It can grip a person. It can influence choices, emotions, posture, and behavior. For some, it has followed them for years, waiting for low moments to reattach.
But when you consider that idea as an entity, something that simply exists in the world of ideas, something remarkable happens:
You realize you don’t have to be in a relationship with it.
You don’t have to fight it. You don’t have to defeat it. You don’t have to prove it wrong.
Fighting gives it power. Proving it wrong acknowledges that it has a rightful claim. Resisting it makes it stronger.
But declining a relationship with it? That restores something far deeper:
Agency.
The Power Is Not in Overcoming the Idea
But in Disengaging the Relationship
When we see ideas as visitors rather than as identities, the whole struggle changes. Instead of wrestling with thoughts, trying to overpower them, you shift to a question of consent.
You get to choose: Do I want a relationship with this idea? Does this idea deserve a seat at my table?
The idea “I am a failure” has force, but it has no authority unless you accept its invitation.
The idea “I am not enough” can be loud, but it cannot act in your life without your permission.
The idea “I always sabotage myself” may appear repeatedly, but it cannot dictate behavior unless you enter into partnership with it.
You are not defeating the idea. You are opting out of the contract.
And that decision is a profound form of freedom.
Ideas That “Have Us” Create Behaviors Without Our Consent
When an idea has us, we live as though we are obligated to act according to its worldview.
An idea about our limitations. An idea about our destiny. An idea about our worth. An idea about our habits or failures or weaknesses.
We often think behaviors define identity. But more often than not, behaviors are downstream from ideas we never questioned. The ideas that quietly took ownership of us.
When viewed this way, a harmful habit is not a permanent flaw. It’s the result of an idea we accidentally held hands with.
And if we didn’t intend that relationship, we can end it.
That’s the liberating piece.
Exiting a Relationship With an Idea
So much of modern culture focuses on positive thinking and mindset shifts such as trying to replace negative ideas with better ones. But there is a quieter practice that may be more powerful:
Recognizing that the idea was never you, and stepping out of the relationship.
You don’t need to justify why the idea is wrong. You don’t need to convince yourself of anything. You don’t need to overpower the idea or silence it.
You simply acknowledge:
“This idea exists. It has its own energy. But I do not choose to be in a relationship with it.”
And then you let it walk back out the door.
The Invitation of Healthier Ideas
If ideas are living things, if they wander, offer themselves, and wait, then the beautiful flip side is also true:
There are ideas that strengthen you. Ideas that grow you. Ideas that align with your purpose. Ideas that invite courage, clarity, or direction.
You don’t have to invent these either. You just recognize them when they arrive.
And when they do, you have the same freedom: Will I enter a relationship with this idea?
Much like people, ideas have temperaments. There are ideas worth befriending. Ideas worth inviting into your home. Ideas worth letting shape your habits, your discipline, your character.
The choice is always there.
Living With Ideas, Not Under Them
This whole perspective shifts us away from self-blame and toward self-awareness.
Instead of “Why am I like this?” the question becomes “Which idea have I unknowingly partnered with?”
Instead of “I must force myself to change,” the question becomes “Is this relationship still serving me?”
And instead of trying to control our minds with white-knuckling discipline or forcing positivity we step into a gentler, more empowered role:
The one who chooses which ideas to welcome and which ones to release.
Ideas exist on their own. They are everywhere floating, approaching, receding, reappearing.
But the relationship is always up to you.
And that is its own kind of strength.
